Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
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