Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994
Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. ~Tom Wilson
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
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